Saturday, April 19, 2008

Falling and Rising Again

"...Though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again...." Proverbs 24:16a

It's been ten days since I've been here in my prayer room and that's been gnawing on me. Yes, I spend time with God in many other ways and rarely miss a night of reading a good chunk of my Bible, but there's something about coming here and soaking in God's presence that impacts me in a way nothing else does and I've been remiss.

I notice too, that when I slide in one area of my life I slide in others as well. I've been trying to lose weight. I had lost 60 pounds in what I could only conclude was a gift from God because they came off relatively easily. But in the last year I've regained twenty and I can't seem to get them off. In the past couple of weeks I've found ways to justify eating things and amounts that I know I shouldn't. Is my lack of discipline in weight loss connected to my lack of discipline in coming to God? I don't know but it might.

This morning the verse at the top of this post came to me. The idea of falling and getting up again is something I was very familiar with as I battled my same-sex attraction issues. I kept falling but I didn't let that deter me from getting up and continuing my pursuit of God. The principle is the same whether my struggle is with ssa, overeating, avoiding prayer time or any other part of my life. When I see I have fallen, I must get up and keep on going.

Father, please help me persevere in my pursuit of you and in my attempt to follow you in all my ways. Forgive me for avoiding time with you in my prayer room. Forgive me for indulging in ways of eating that I have committed to avoid. Thank you for your grace, Father, and may I honour you in all I do.

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