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"The most important [commandment]," answered Jesus, "is this: 'Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.'” Mark 12:29, 30 NIV

“If the mainspring of your service is love for God, no ingratitude, no sin, no devil, no angel, can hinder you from serving your fellow-men, no matter how they treat you.” --Oswald Chambers*

“We shall easily be the servant of all men, not because it is our ideal, but because we cannot help it. Our eye is not consciously on our service, but on our Saviour.” --Chambers*

“His honour is at stake wherever I take my body. My body is the temple of the Holy Ghost, therefore I have to see that it is [His] obedient slave....” --Chambers*
God at the centre. God, the sole object of my love. God, the focus of my heart, soul, mind and strength. God, the mainspring of all I do and of all I honour.
“ the unconscious result of the life being rightly related to God and centred in Him.” --Chambers* (Emphasis added)
God, so central to who I am that I become transparent, even to myself, that my thoughts, words and actions are his, without any awareness on my part.

Does this describe me? Where is God in my life? Do I love him above all else? Do I love him with every part of me? Am I a temple worthy of his presence or have I instead set up myself as “a sacrilegious object that causes desecration” in this temple built by God? (Daniel 9:27 NLT)? From what and where does my life flow?

God, I want to love you more than anything or anyone else. Too easily I allow my expectations of how others will treat me to determine what I think, say and do; too easily I make my comfort and others’ thoughts about me decide what I do instead of being so focused on you that I see nothing but you, hear nothing but you, love nothing but you. Too much am I caught up in what serves me. I don’t want the idol of myself desecrating this temple you have chosen to live in but I seem incapable of destroying it. Would you do that for me, God? Would you come, make “a whip out of cords, and [drive] all [that detracts from you] from the temple” of my body? (John 2:15 NIV) Heal my unrighteousness, Lord! Cleanse me so that you are all that shows.

*Oswald Chambers. “Ourselves: I; Me: Mine: Ourselves As “Ourselves.” “Self.” In “Biblical Psychology” in The Complete Works of Oswald Chambers, pages 191 – 195.


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About the Author


I'm married (35 years in December 2008) with four grown sons. I love my city (Winnipeg) and my country (Canada) and promote them both to whoever will listen. God (through Jesus Christ) is the biggest part of my life. I am learning to let him take control of all areas--though I do better at this some times more than others.

I have written a book that's recently been published about part of my journey with God. In it I tell how God confronted me with the same-sex attraction issues I've struggled with all my adult life and how he led me through them to a deeper and more meaningful relationship with him. God is amazing—his forgiveness, his love, his movement in our lives when we allow him and so much more. I suspect God will never run out of things to teach me or ways to make me grow and that’s a good thing (though often very painful).

I suppose I can say that what gives me the greatest pleasure in life is telling others about…

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Reviews of Searching for Love

If you have read the book, I would love to hear your thoughts on it. You may e-mail me at or post them in the comments section below.

A Real Testimony
I finished your book. A real testimony to what God does for us.
Leona March 3, 2009
I Had Tears Coming

I sat down to read it about a week later and ended up finishing it the same night. At first I admit I was a little bored and thought that the whole book was about a battle all in your mind, but as I continued reading this creeping thought came over me of a different...struggle in my own life, that I would never in my right mind have shared with anyone accept maybe God. I've mentioned your book to a few people because it stirs up age-old controversies that I have myself argued and wondered about, namely about whether or not homosexuality can be cured or just managed like alcoholism--you just have to stay away from temptation. I noticed at the end of your book that your struggle story …