Friday, April 25, 2008

Abandoned but Committed

“As surely as God lives, who has denied me justice, the Almighty, who has made me taste bitterness of soul,...my lips will not speak wickedness, and my tongue will utter no deceit.” Job 27:2, 4
Job recognizes that all the bad that has come to him is God’s “fault.” God has denied him justice and given him great bitterness of soul but, even so, he will continue to honour God and not speak what is wrong.

Am I like that? Am I so committed to God that, when it seems like he has abandoned me or, worse, caused my pain, I can be like Job and persist in my honour, worship and praise of God? Could I do this if I learned that all my sons were killed? If my husband abandoned me? If all my financial security vanished? If I had no home, no friends, no support system?

On what is my commitment to God based? Is it based on what he gives me? The blessings I receive? I hope it is based on who God is: my Creator, my Lover, my Rock.

Father, I want to be totally committed to you despite what happens in and around me. I want to be extravagantly devoted to you, even in the face of your seeming abandonment of me. Please help me!

Thursday, April 24, 2008

A Whisper of His Power

“And these are but the outer fringe of his works; how faint the whisper we hear of him! Who then can understand the thunder of his power?” Job 26:14
NIV

“These are some of the minor things he does, merely a whisper of his power. Who can understand the thunder of his power?” Job 26:14 NLV
The outer fringe of his works, merely a whisper of his power.

A thunderstorm?
A whisper of God’s power.

The northern lights?
The outer fringe of his works.

The towering Himalayas?
A whisper of his power.

The complexity of the human nervous system?
The outer fringe of his works.

The graceful movements of a dragonfly?
A whisper of God’s power.

The fury of the ocean beneath hurricane winds?
The outer fringe of God’s works.

The vast grasslands of North America?
A whisper of his power.

The love that brings two hearts together?
The outer fringe of his works.

The mystery of the cross?
A whisper of his power.

Who can understand the thunder
When even the whisper eludes our grasp?

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Confident Hope

“I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth.” Job 19:25
My Redeemer lives. He will rescue me. He will defend me. In the end it is him and not my accuser or tormentor who remains standing. Therefore I have hope.

I love this part of Handel’s Messiah and have often sung to myself the first line or two when all seems black and without hope. He lives! He will remain standing. He is in control and he is Victor even when all around me contradicts this belief.

Can you feel the strength and power in those words? My Redeemer lives! There is hope. He is not dead, he does not sleep. He lives! I can go on and continue in my pain and darkness knowing that at the right time he will do what his name declares. He will redeem me, save me, bring me succour and nothing can stop him because in the end it will be him standing not his (or my) enemies.

Confident hope. Hallelujah! My Redeemer lives and in the end he will stand.

Thank you, Jesus, that you give this hope; that you are my Redeemer and nothing will stop you. You are the Victor. In the end it will be you standing with Satan under your feet. Keep me confident of this truth when all around me seems dark and hopeless.

Monday, April 21, 2008

Hopelessness and Despair

“My days have passed, my plans are shattered, and so are the desires of my heart.” Job 17:11
Oswald Chambers says that this verse “is unequalled in any language under heaven” for “unfathomable pathos.”* My life is nearly over and nothing I wanted from life has happened. Life has failed me. There is no hope; only despair.

Have you ever felt this way? I have. Sometimes the pain of living is so overwhelming that death seems to be the only answer. Job himself said he wished he had never been born. What do we do when we find ourselves at the bottom of the barrel with no way out? Where can we find hope? Job asks this very question: “Who can see any hope for me?”

We know from the end of the story that there was hope. All his possessions were doubled, his seven children replaced with seven more and his life extended so that he lived to see his great-great grandchildren. God vindicated him. But what about us? What do we do in the midst of our despairing hopelessness? We can’t see the end. We don’t know how things will turn out. Our cries for mercy seem to echo against the walls of our canyon with no response.

In Job’s next speech we will see where he found hope and where we too can find it. Until we find a reason for hope, we sit in our darkness and wait.

Lord, when despair comes upon me and I see no way out, help me sit and wait in quiet patience.


*p.68, “Baffled to Fight Better,” The Complete Works of Oswald Chambers

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Theological Tyranny

Job 15—Eliphaz

Religious tyranny holds onto theology rather than on to God. It has its set of beliefs and refuses to adjust them when all around it is shown to be wrong. This is the problem the Pharisees had. They could not accept God the Father as Jesus presented him to be because it contradicted the castles of air they had built. They had taken what God had taught through Moses and twisted it out of recognition by all the traditions they had developed. These traditions had been created as an attempt to follow and obey what God had taught but in the process, in the focusing on their interpretations and understandings, they lost God.

I see a parallel to today. Many churches, theologians and Christians, when faced with new ways of God’s revelation to us assume that it must be from the devil because it doesn’t match anything they’ve understood about God. Rather than considering that perhaps they have not had a full understanding of God (and who does?) they assume that what is “new” is wrong.

Oswald Chambers’ discussion of Eliphaz’s speech to Job* makes sense but it jars what I have been taught. In the late 1960s and early 70s, when the Jesus Movement broke out in tongues a book my church published warned against speaking in tongues and attempted to prove that it was not God moving the speech of these people but Satan. In later years when the “Toronto Blessing” was high in the news, the whole idea of God knocking a person to the floor seemed ludicrous to me and to most of the people I knew.

I was intensely sceptical until a good friend came back from Toronto completely changed after falling to the floor because of God’s presence. This was definitely the work of God and not of evil and I had to re-evaluate my theology accordingly. Chambers writes, “Theology is second, not first; in its place it is a handmaid of religion, but it becomes a tyrant if put in the first place.” Dogmatism is never right. We will never have a complete and total understanding of who God is or how and why he does what he does. We must be willing to hold our beliefs loosely, willing to adjust them when an encounter with God disputes them.

Eliphaz and Job’s other friends were not able to do this. They “knew” that God brings punishment to the wicked and blessing to the righteous and since Job was experiencing everything they understood to be punishment, they concluded that he was wicked and deserved all he got. Chambers advises, “Never be afraid if your circumstances dispute what you have been taught about God; be willing to examine what you have been taught, and never take the conception of an [sic] theologian as infallible; it is simply an attempt to state things.” I agree.

Lord, please keep my eyes on you and not on my beliefs. Let me not be so entrenched in any theology that I miss seeing you and what you are doing.





*"Baffled to Fight Better" in The Complete Works of Oswald Chambers.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Falling and Rising Again

"...Though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again...." Proverbs 24:16a

It's been ten days since I've been here in my prayer room and that's been gnawing on me. Yes, I spend time with God in many other ways and rarely miss a night of reading a good chunk of my Bible, but there's something about coming here and soaking in God's presence that impacts me in a way nothing else does and I've been remiss.

I notice too, that when I slide in one area of my life I slide in others as well. I've been trying to lose weight. I had lost 60 pounds in what I could only conclude was a gift from God because they came off relatively easily. But in the last year I've regained twenty and I can't seem to get them off. In the past couple of weeks I've found ways to justify eating things and amounts that I know I shouldn't. Is my lack of discipline in weight loss connected to my lack of discipline in coming to God? I don't know but it might.

This morning the verse at the top of this post came to me. The idea of falling and getting up again is something I was very familiar with as I battled my same-sex attraction issues. I kept falling but I didn't let that deter me from getting up and continuing my pursuit of God. The principle is the same whether my struggle is with ssa, overeating, avoiding prayer time or any other part of my life. When I see I have fallen, I must get up and keep on going.

Father, please help me persevere in my pursuit of you and in my attempt to follow you in all my ways. Forgive me for avoiding time with you in my prayer room. Forgive me for indulging in ways of eating that I have committed to avoid. Thank you for your grace, Father, and may I honour you in all I do.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Controversy and Silence

He was oppressed and afflicted, yet he did not open his mouth; he was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth. Isaiah 53:7 (NIV)

When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. 1 Peter 2:23 (NIV)

"Eschew controversy, my brethren, as you would eschew the entrance to hell itself. Let them have it their way; let them talk; let them write; let them correct you; let them traduce* you; let them judge and condemn you; let them slay you. Rather let the truth of God suffer itself, than that divine nature in you to be a controversialist."
(Alexander Whyte, quoted by Oswald Chambers in "Baffled to Fight Better" in The Complete Works of Oswald Chambers p. 62)

"Heal me of this lust of mine of always vindicating myself."
(Augustine, quoted by Oswald Chambers same page as above.)



*Traduce: To expose to contempt or shame by means of false statements or misrepresentation; to represent as blamable; to vilify. (Dictionary.com)

Monday, April 7, 2008

Zophar the Bombast

If someone was to hand me the contents of Job 11 out of context, I don’t know that I’d see a whole lot wrong with it. There is much that sounds like what any Christian speaker or writer might say—or even David in the Psalms. What is wrong with statements like, “If you devote your heart to [God] and stretch out your hands to him…you will lift up your face without shame; you will stand firm without fear”? (v. 13, 15) Who can argue against the idea that we cannot fathom the mysteries of God? (v.7) Who would disagree that there is security and hope for those devoted to God?

And yet we know from the end of the book that Zophar was, as Oswald Chambers suggests, full of bombast—defined by dictionary.com as “pompous or pretentious speech or writing.” I love Chambers’ alliterations. Check out the four section headings for his discussion about Job 11:

Stirring of Self-Respecting Indignation
Schemes of Spurious Invocation
Self-Consciousness of Serious Instruction
Self-Complacency of Sentimental Integrity

I wonder how long it took him to create titles like that? The Complete Works of Oswald Chambers is 1486 pages long—large pages with small print—and every page has its own set of alliterating headings. But I digress.

Chambers obviously has no use for Zophar or the pompous, self-important Christians who are full of their own knowledge. I cringed as I read what Chambers had to say because I could see a lot of who I used to be in his denunciations and I wonder how much of Zophar is still in me. I hope not much. Today I want to quote a few of the sentences I underlined.

We use terms of righteous indignation to condemn the thing we are not guilt of, while all the time we may be guilty of tenfold worse.

...

Another trick of bombastic religion is to appeal to God in order to back up a position which is obviously questionable.

...

When we are facing problems we must see to it that we are reverent and silent, for the most part, with what we do not understand.

...

God uses children, and books, and flowers in the spiritual instruction of a man, but he seldom uses the self-conscious prig who consciously instructs…. The very nature of spiritual instruction is that it is unconscious of itself; it is the life of a child, manifesting obedience, not ostentation.

...

If you are a religious person of the “Zophar” type and can work up sufficient religious indignation, you will come to the conclusion that you and God must go together, it is quite impossible for you to be mistaken; then you will begin to instruct others on the same line, and will inevitably end by placing things in a totally false light.

God, I don’t want to be a Zophar—a self-righteous prig full of herself and empty of you. Keep me on the path of childlike obedience and keep my focus on you, not myself or what I know. Thank you, Father. Amen.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

Perplexities and Questions

After too long of a break, I am continuing my study of Job with Oswald Chambers. This morning I looked at Job 9-10. Job is speaking in these two chapters. According to Chambers, Job’s friends have a creed they believe or follow—a list of statements they are certain are true—and all they experience or observe is filtered through this creed. Their creed allows for no uncertainties or perplexities but rather assumes that it contains all there is to know about God.

Job, on the other hand, is faced with perplexities. He knows he is innocent and yet he feels crushed. Being crushed, however, does not destroy his belief in God. In these two chapters he waxes eloquently about God and attributes to God what truly belongs to God:

His wisdom is profound, his power is vast…He moves mountains without their knowing it…He speaks to the sun and it does not shine…He alone stretches out the heavens and treads on the waves of the sea. (9:4, 5, 7, 8 NIV)
At the same time, he is not afraid of facts that might challenge what he has believed up till now. The facts speak for themselves: Job is suffering even though he’s innocent; and so he asks questions in an attempt to understand the God he trusts who has afflicted him:

Does it please you to oppress me…? Are your days like those of a mortal…that you must search out my faults…though you know that I am not guilty and that no one can rescue me from your hand? Your hands shaped me and made me. Will you now turn and destroy me... Why did you bring me out of the womb? (10:3, 5-8, 18 NIV)
Job’s friends are certain they know everything there is to know about God and attempt to fit God into the box they have made. Job, by his questions, admits there is much about God he does not know or understand and invites God to make himself understood. Oswald Chambers writes,
The whole point of vital Christianity is not the refusal to face things, but a matter of personal relationship, and it is the kind of thing that Job went through which brings a man to this issue.*
This fits my experience and explains something that had puzzled me. I had been praying that God would heal me of my depression when one day he told me very distinctly to stop making that request. Chambers’ statement answers why. In my state of depression I am pushed into a relationship with God that I might not seek if all was well in my life.

Chambers says,
When a man receives the Holy Spirit, his problems are not altered, but he has a Refuge from which he can deal with them; before, he was out in the world being battered, now the centre of his life is at rest and he can begin, bit by bit, to get things uncovered and rightly related.*
I like that. Following God does not wipe away our problems. If it did, the book of Job would never have been written. Instead, the problems invite us to come to God with our questions and wait with trust that he has the answers.

God, like Job, I have many questions. Please help me wait with patient trust for the answers I know you have. Keep me in the place where you are my refuge and the centre of my being.



*“Baffled to Fight Better” in The Complete Works of Oswald Chambers pages 59-60.