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Pinewood Lodge--Day Two--Unite us Lord!

Tuesday, March 31, 7:50 a.m.

Good morning, God! I slept well, for a good nine hours. It feels nice. Tom’s still sleeping and will probably sleep till noon so I have a nice chunk of time to spend alone with you.

Thank you for the beauty of this place and for the simplicity of living here. There are no demands on time, we can do what we want and don’t even have to clean. I didn’t need a nap yesterday, either. I wanted one, I was so tired, but I made it through. I need to find a way to make it through today’s tired hours. Being aware that I am tired in the late afternoon will help me to push through that tiredness so I can go to bed at a decent hour and get a good, solid sleep at night.

Please knit Tom and I together, closer and closer. Take down the barriers we’ve built between us, God, and unite us as one. May our marriage become a song of praise to you for all who know us. May we both draw closer to you as well, God. I want to be in tune with both you and Tom and Tom with me and you. Heal each of us inside, please. Heal us and make us whole—as individuals and as a couple. Nothing is impossible for you, God, and I am depending on you for this. So be it.


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About the Author


I'm married (35 years in December 2008) with four grown sons. I love my city (Winnipeg) and my country (Canada) and promote them both to whoever will listen. God (through Jesus Christ) is the biggest part of my life. I am learning to let him take control of all areas--though I do better at this some times more than others.

I have written a book that's recently been published about part of my journey with God. In it I tell how God confronted me with the same-sex attraction issues I've struggled with all my adult life and how he led me through them to a deeper and more meaningful relationship with him. God is amazing—his forgiveness, his love, his movement in our lives when we allow him and so much more. I suspect God will never run out of things to teach me or ways to make me grow and that’s a good thing (though often very painful).

I suppose I can say that what gives me the greatest pleasure in life is telling others about…

Memories of Mikael Vincent Tien Doe Chan

Reviews of Searching for Love

If you have read the book, I would love to hear your thoughts on it. You may e-mail me at or post them in the comments section below.

A Real Testimony
I finished your book. A real testimony to what God does for us.
Leona March 3, 2009
I Had Tears Coming

I sat down to read it about a week later and ended up finishing it the same night. At first I admit I was a little bored and thought that the whole book was about a battle all in your mind, but as I continued reading this creeping thought came over me of a different...struggle in my own life, that I would never in my right mind have shared with anyone accept maybe God. I've mentioned your book to a few people because it stirs up age-old controversies that I have myself argued and wondered about, namely about whether or not homosexuality can be cured or just managed like alcoholism--you just have to stay away from temptation. I noticed at the end of your book that your struggle story …