Skip to main content

Not Doing Well

I'm not doing well.  Has the grief finally hit?  Perhaps.  I'm doing nothing much other than sleeping, I have no energy and I haven't been out of the house since returning from Vancouver except to see the doctor once.  I would appreciate your prayers.  Thank you.


Harmony said…
Hello Debbie,

My husband and I continue to pray for you and your family.

Each person is unique in the way they deal with grief and you have had much to do and prepare for since Mikael's death; your attention has been focused on getting chores and tasks done first for his funeral and then for your other son's wedding. Now you can relax and with that will come the flow of grief that you have had to put aside until now.

Remember that God is with you every step of the way and that He wants to take your burden. He is with you in this valley. Believe it, know it, and embrace His presence.

Grief has many manifestations and doesn't occur in any systematic order. My sense is that you are so "other focused" that you have likely been propping others up. Now it is your time to rest, heal and abide in God's care.

Take care
Your sister in Christ
Shirley (aka Harmony)
Thank you, Shirley. I know that everything you said is true and I know that God is with me. Couldn't do it without him. You're right about the uniqueness of grief for each person. Tom's grief is tied into his thoughts and emotions. Mine is much more physical, as if my mind can't or won't touch it, so it gives it to the body to deal with. It's certainly interesting to watch the differences. Thanks for the encouragement to rest, heal and abide in God's care.

Popular posts from this blog

Monogamous, Homosexual Unions--My Position and the Story behind it

I've been asked to be one of two participants at church each representing opposing views on the matter of monogamous, homosexual unions, moderated by the pastor.  In preparation, I have written the following.  In the comments, please do not post any vitriol--from either side. If I think any comment is hateful, I will delete it. Respectful disagreement or questions are welcome, however.

My Position and Values:
I believe that sexual relations between two people of the same sex is contrary to God’s will.I would like to say otherwise but I find nothing in Scripture that allows me to do so.BEING homosexual, having a longing or desire for someone of the same sex, is not condemned in the Bible.  We all have desires that are contrary to God’s will.  The sin occurs when we feed those desires, like Jesus talks about when he calls lust adultery (Matthew 5:28).Much cruelty to LGBTQ people has happened because of the stance of the Church. We have not acted with love, compassion and listening ear…

In My Prayer Room

Oh God
You surround me with your love,
with memories
of who you are
of what you've done
of promises you've made
of who I want to be
of who I am because of you.

You give me hope and joy,
peace and gratitude.
You convict me
and teach me
encourage me
and remind me
of what it means to follow you.

You listen to my prayers
and grant my requests
in your time.
You give me insight
and knowledge
and words to write
to share your presence
your goodness
your love
your admonition
with others.

You expand my love
to pray for friend and foe
near and far
family and stranger
people as pins on maps
clustered and scattered
who know you and reject you
for those in need
and those too full to need.

You draw me close
and then release me
to bring you close to others
to serve
and love
and give
all I have received.

You fill my heart with joy
that warms
and glows
and bursts
into laughter,
and even dance.

You wrap me in your arms
and tell me
"You are mine"
with intensity that burns
and smoul…

Eulogy for Mikael

It's 3:13 a.m. as I write this, just hours before Mikael's funeral. I've slept 2 1/2 hours already but when I woke I couldn't get back to sleep. I am so full of joy I have no room for grief. I lay in bed two hours ago, feeling this joy well up into near excitement, undergirded with a peace and contentment that to most people would make no sense. I'm not sure it makes sense to me but I know it's real. God has been so good. He has poured out his blessings on us this week and I feel like we are the most blessed family in the world right now.
I can't imagine life without Mikael. I'm still in shock, running on adrenaline and the drive to give Mikael the best farewell ever and not wanting to miss a moment of the flood of family and friends who have been pouring into our home with cards, flowers, meals, goodies, more meals and goodies, love, prayers and memories. I've been sitting in an armchair where I have a straight line of sight to the front entrance, a…